Growing Pains
As humans we all go through stages of life. We are born as infants in need of constant love and attention. The world is new to us and we are both scared and inspired. Once we uncover the use of our legs we are known as toddlers. Marvellous new objects are within our reach and curiosity and discovery take over.
Sometimes we discover great things other times we discover the lessons in life, typically by making mistakes.
This week I have realized that the same stages of life apply to a phoenix.
When I first emerged from the fire and ash of my former life I was scared. I didn’t know what this new life had in store for me and terror sometimes gripped me so tightly that I would curl up and cry. Despite being afraid, I was also intrigued. Suddenly, the life I had known had been replaced with a new reality, one with no limitations…my own life! I didn’t know (and still don’t) what the future held for me but realizing the potential that lay before me gave me the motivation I needed to uncurl from my fetal position and stand up.
Truth be told, my infancy stage lasted a year and a half or perhaps I was still dying for the majority of it. Either way, the phoenix is now standing and I’m discovering things all over again and some things for the first time.
Just as a toddler has to learn through error, so does the phoenix. This week alone has provided repeated education that thankfully I can laugh about. This brings us now to the embarrassing revelations for the week.
#1 – WATER IS WET
I went to go get my car washed on Monday. I paid the attendant, pulled up to the car wash, rolled my window down and punched in the magical pass code that provided me entrance to the car wash. As the door opened I got so excited that I pulled right in…forgetting to wind up the window! As I pulled in to the building a blast of water sprayed the side of my head and the inside of my car. At first I couldn’t figure out what to do, then I slowly realized that pushing the same button I used to wind the window down could be used to secure it back to its closed position! Eureka!
#2 – GREEN MEANS GO
The car wash assault must have stunned me a bit, or perhaps this is just another example of learning life’s lessons all over again, but after exiting from the car wash I approached an intersection to turn left. Like a great driver would I pulled in to the turn lane and stopped with my front wheels slightly back from the cross walk. I sat there listening to my tunes joyously…until I realized that I was sitting still at a GREEN LIGHT!!! Thank goodness there were few people around to watch as I skulked around the corner.
#3 – WOOD IS HARD
At the end of my work day, I closed down my computer and personal laptop to get ready to go home. As I have done every night for the last month, I crawled under my desk to unplug my laptop and pack it away. Unlike every other night I somehow misjudged the edge of the desk and sat up abruptly. My head smashed against the hard wood and immediately saw stars.
#4 – IMPULSES ARE FUNNY AND FUN
This morning I got on the elevator as I’ve done every day before. I was enjoying the slow ride to the basement where my car was waiting for me. For some strange reason I got a horrible urge to do something completely silly! Little bubbly giggles rose up from the pit of my stomach enticing me to give in. So I did! As the doors opened to the basement I ran my hand over all of the buttons on the elevator wall, watching as they lit up like….well something bright anyway. I ran down the hallway afterwards giggling to myself. The whole thing tickled me.
So, there you have it. This phoenix is now a toddler.
Despite the silliness and the unexpected stupidity I truly do enjoy this life of new discovery. When I look back at my first life, I sometimes wonder if I was actually living MY life. Most of the time I can say, without question that I wasn’t but now is my chance.
I know there will be growing pains and embarrassing lessons to learn but I finally am living my own life, one without compromise and one I know I will be proud of.
Love and Hugs,
Farrah
